Welcoming Life's Updates: Why We Need Growing Pains for Success

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:00:17

Well, hello and welcome to Blank Pages, the podcast. A podcast for people who appreciate the new beginnings of a clean slate, but strive for the courage, willingness, curiosity, and creativity available only on the blank pages of new possibilities. It's the potential to move beyond and move forward, where people are willing to make new decisions from fresh perspectives and are ready to write in a much better way. So the world is waiting, and nothing listens better than a blank piece of paper. Hello. Hello. I'm your host, Tim Pecororo, and I am so glad that we're here. And we're gonna jump into a fun little topic that I've actually been experiencing myself.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:01:01

Right? You ever notice when things start to get good, man, they start feeling good, right? And then all of a sudden you feel some of the aches and the pains or the bumps and the bruises and the, you know, those things that just kind of show up, you know, I like to look at it as, you know, you're going along, things are happening, and then all of a sudden you feel this tap on your shoulder and you can turn around and you can feel like it's the entire world. It's just like, hey there. You know? So, yeah, this is episode, I believe we're at 1920, somewhere around there. 1819, 2020, maybe it's in one of those three. So we're gonna go with that. I just want to say thanks for those of you who have been listening to the show, and if you have not subscribed yet, please go to any platform you like, Spotify, Amazon Music, Apple Podcasts, and subscribe to the show. I'd appreciate that. There's also, if you're a sub stack person, you can go there.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:01:58

I'm gonna look into, into getting into there a little bit more because for some writing purposes and stuff, but it's kind of this neat little place where you can find, you discover some really cool stuff. If you're listening to the show and you go into sub stack or you do anything like that, do me a favor, like go and dm me on Instagram pecoraro, just tell me some, share with me some things that you check out or you think would be cool and interesting to look into. So yeah, substack is pretty cool. So also, if you would please, when you're in Instagram, go to my bio section, click on the link, and you can subscribe to the newsletter that I am putting out. And we are doing that monthly. And we'll add some more goodies into it as we move along in the future. But right now, it is just a, just a quick way for us to recap everything I've been talking about on the show. Do some other ideas or things that I'm going to be talking about, some opportunities that may be coming that I'll be putting out for people to just engage with stuff that I may be doing.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:03:08

I do have some courses I'm going to be launching, stuff like that. I do also have free resources and of course, most importantly, I just would like to be able to stay connected with you and give you some things that will add value to your life and shelf life, stuff that you can always go back to and it will still work. Right. It's like, you know, pasta, you can do a lot with it. So that's what I want, stuff that you can work with. So anyways, I've enjoyed the last several weeks, obviously, I've been enjoying all the podcasts I've been able to do and the topics I've been able to talk about. But the one, the one last week was so, or the last three weeks just have been great for me because it's just doing hard things and the hard stuff right, but doing hard things well, which is it's not easy to do, obviously, to do hard stuff well. Some people could say I'm an expert at doing hard things well because my whole life has been full of hard stuff.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:04:04

And if that's true, like for all the right reasons, I think that's great. I think that's awesome that they have that outlook. But I don't want to feel like you just have to go through hard stuff in order to get good. Right? Because some things are going to naturally happen, some things are going to, it's just part of life. It's what you go through. It's where growth and transformation introduce themselves to, to you. They say, hey, you know, there's always an opportunity. So we're born to grow, we're born that way.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:04:34

We're born, we're conceived, we're life, we're, we come to being. We have, I believe, spirit. All of this, we, we come out into this human form and we got this, we're wearing this human suit, this life suit. And in us we have the spirit with, we have a conscience, like where we have, we can get conviction and we make decisions, like all this stuff is bundled up in here. But every day offers a challenge, and that challenge is going to go along with the process of the only way we can improve or evolve or to do anything that takes us to another step or another step up or better is it's going to have to be through growing, right? So yay, no fun. But growing is the absolute only thing that can give us any close to opportunity, any real opportunity, anything close to be considered as an opportunity to have success. You have to grow. You have to advance.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:05:40

If it's a race, you have to advance someone, you have to win it. In other words, you have to propel, move forward. Who's the fastest at it. Right? So there's something has to be done in order to succeed. There has to be something, someone has to be the best or the first or whatever. You have to advance. Something has to be pushed to or moved in a direction to win a race. Well, in order for us to grow, we have to go through a process.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:06:06

You have to go through things. And so the growing pains just, I just want to talk about why they're important, because the growing pains, even though they're uncomfortable, they're really the truest signs for us. And that's why it's important to me, if you want to know, for signs of, like, growing in transformation. I'm kind of laughing at myself because I know for some people, they're sitting there going, man, I'm hurting all the time. Does that mean I'm growing? Yeah, you're growing all the time. Maybe some of the hurting and things, and even for myself, it's because we're just doing repeat. You know what I mean? We're doing things on repeat. And that could be, it could be, you know, that's the reason why you're feeling all of that all the time.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:06:47

But usually, if you're feeling it all the time, it's because you're putting yourself out there to be challenged. And that's a, that's a great way to live your life. But it's all around growing pains. I want to just talk about dealing with these growing pains, having these growing pains, the importance of embracing these growing pains in your life, in your career, relationships, whatever it is in your body, they're growing pains. So I'm going to go ahead and give you this definition of growing pains. So first, I'm going to give you a physical definition. It's simple. And these are basic things that we're going to, we're going to hit on today.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:07:18

Just real simple. So in children, we know growing pains typically are experiencing the legs. They're often described as like, it's an ache and throbbing sensation. I remember one of ours, our kids just would struggle. Leg, eggs, legs hurting. Two of them are really tall. So it's the taller ones that I think got all the growing pains in their legs and the oldest, who's the shortest, did not get all those growing pains in the legs. But they're pains, they occur at night and it happens a lot in preschool and school aged children.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:07:50

And what they say is the cause isn't well understood, but it's thought to be linked to that natural growth process, such as the stretching of muscles and tendons that keep up with the bone that's actually growing. So everything that's going to support and connect to that bone, you're getting pain as it relates to it. So let's now take that into a metaphorical picture. So in life work, growing pains refer to what difficulties encountered when undergoing significant changes or improvements. That's a growth. This includes the stress of taking on a new job or a role. Challenges faced when you start maybe a new business, new relationship, the upheaval involved in moving to maybe a new house or a new location. But the pains, what they are is they're just indicators of change and they're often going to just precede the periods of significant development and it's going to be that indicator.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:08:54

It's like that light, but, you know, as people, we don't like that. We, I mean, it's like we just don't like it. I mean, I know I don't like it so much. I mean, I enjoy growing. I love the man, I love the results of growing, but. But the process sometimes is not fun. And so, I mean, maybe one day you talk about how do you make your growing pains fun. How do you make fun out of growing pains? I don't know.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:09:22

All I know is, is I enjoy what's on the other side. And so that helps me to know that I need to go through the process and, and it's kind of like this. Let me give you this example. Growing pains are like software updates for humans, right? That's if I'm going to use it as a metaphor, so it could, you know, so when you think about that stress and everything, like in these indicator lights and all this stuff, you know, and the reason I'm saying it's like a software update because we need updates all the time, but they come at the worst possible times. It's like, oh, everything's hacked, like everything's breached or there's a security breach. I think it's great that they can deploy, you know, system, you know, deploy patches and things to fix bugs and operating systems and all that. I think that's great. But man, it's never at the right time.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:10:06

It makes everything weird. It makes everything uncomfortable. I know for me, I use software tools and all these things, and when they do these updates and your operating system updates, but then it causes something else to break and then something else to break. And, I mean, it's part of the process, but it's a growing pain. I mean, it makes it to where I've upgraded one system, but now I've got to downgrade back because I've upgraded the main system. Oh, my gosh. You know, sometimes you're not sure if you're better off without them, right? But no, you need them because there's always new threats, there's new things, there's always new challenges. There's always this new stuff.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:10:42

So you need it. Well, it's the same thing in your body. Your body's going to have those pains. Your life's going to have those pains. Your job's going to have those pains. There are going to be things that shift that are outside your control, and you're going to get those pains. Growing pains are coming, but they are what's needed. They're just inconvenient.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:11:00

So we need these growing pains. Why? I'll just use it as an example. If you don't have it, if you don't have the growing pains, it means you don't have growth. It'd be like going. It'd be like when we took our kids, when my wife and I said, we're gonna go. We went to our pediatrician, we said, listen, kids waking up in the middle of the night, we can't sleep. Kids waking up every single night. My legs ache.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:11:21

My legs hurt. We can't just give them medicine. You can't give them aspirin. You can't give them, like, what do we do? We get a little heat thing, all that stuff. It hurts. It's deeper. I don't understand. It hurts.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:11:30

I mean, what do we do, doc? What if we said, hey, what do we do? The doctor says, well, the only way to stop the growing pains is if you stop the growing. And let's just say there was, I don't know, some sort of button or switch, whatever. You just cut off the growing. I mean, why would you do that? I mean, we understand it's uncomfortable because I don't want anyone to hurt either, but why would you do that? Why would you take away the possibility of how tall the child could be, how fast the child could be, how strong the child could be, how capable and able the child could be? Like, why would you do that because of that inconvenience? No one would. That's foolishness. But yet that's what we do. So why is it important for us to go through these growing pains? You know, it's. It's because there's stages of development, and it's kind of like caterpillars go through metamorphosis, and so do.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:12:19

And people do, too. I'm just gonna. I'm gonna kind of give you an example. A caterpillar to butterfly, right? The butterfly undergoes distinct changes, like egg larva. That's the caterpillar part, the pupa, which is the chrysalis, they say. And then it becomes an adult butterfly. But each stage prepares the butterfly for its ultimate form and function. Well, human does the same thing.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:12:38

Various development stages, infancy, childhood, adolescence, adulthood. So each phase builds upon the last, contributing to the physical, emotional, intellectual growth. But then there's also in us, right, the necessity of a struggle. This is why growth pains are important. You need them. You know you're in it. Why? And it's a necessity for struggle. A caterpillar.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:13:01

During the pupa stage, caterpillar is encased in this chrysalis, where it's got a struggle to emerge. A butterfly. The struggle is vital as it forces fluids like, check this out, from the body into the wings to prepare it for flying. It needs to struggle well. Humans also face struggles, and they're essential for their development and the challenges, such as learning new skills, overcoming personal setbacks, navigating social dynamics. They're crucial for building strength, resilience, capability. Look, if you have to put them in competition, kids need to compete for things. They need to be challenged.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:13:36

I don't care if it's musical chairs. I don't care if it's hula hoop. I don't care if it's hopscotch. I don't care if it's full contact martial arts, whatever it is, you need to get them to compete. All of this is important for them to be able to grow. Adults still need to do that. We need to engage in healthy things that are going to cause us to go through growing pains. So why is it important to grow? Right.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:14:02

It's stages of development. Necessity of a struggle, transformation. A butterfly transforms from caterpillar into butterfly. That's a metamorphosis. It's dramatic. It is a complete change. The caterpillar's body literally digests itself to reform as a butterfly, representing a complete change. I mean, check it out.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:14:24

It digests itself to become something else. Humans we transform are often more internal and can be equally profound. Right? So we change in our beliefs, we change in behaviors, we change in life paths that will represent significant personal metamorphosis ourselves. Right? That redefine who we are and how we see ourselves, how we show up, where our values are, what's important. I mean, that's incredible to me. But then here's another thing that, and this is kind of where I want to bundle us up here, is we emerge with new abilities. When we embrace the growing pains, we emerge with a new ability because of it. I mean, remember, go back to that caterpillar in that whole cycle and it goes through it.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:15:17

I mean, it digests itself like, and it goes through and uses that to transform. I mean, look, everything you have, these things are in you. And you were built that way. I believe that we were designed by God and wired that way, that it's in us and we can transform. And yes, as humans with this, we can learn to come out with these new abilities. We go through this metamorphosis of change and we have new educational things, personal experiences, professional development. We're able to now take on new heights. All we have to do is read things.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:15:56

And then, and if once we know what it's like to just allow ourselves to go through the growth and process to take on something new, I mean, we can do amazing things. Our lives can be wrapped up in so much fulfillment. I mean, what's a basic way for you to just like a real anecdote, right? So, for instance, if you're professionally, you want to go through a growing pain, say you're promoted, you go through a promotion, and it's the first time. Right. You're in a management role or a leadership role. And the transition from being a team member to this lead, it's going to be tough. It's going to have its challenges and asserting your authority. You're going to have to now to take authority.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:16:36

You have peer relationships that now are going to change and you're going to have to learn how to gain respect. But over time, you can learn essential leadership skills. That's the good part. And it's going to challenge you because they're going to be people who are not going to like you. They're going to be people that are going to be unhappy. They're going to be people that say they know different ways and better ways. That's part of the journey, right? Let's just say you want to, I don't know, you want to write better. You want to just be a better writer.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:17:09

And you want to just make me write a book, whether it's a nonfiction or a novel. So you're going to sit down, you're going to get all these rejections, and you're going to write things for people to tell you they don't like it. They're going to tell you what's wrong with it. I'm going to tell you why it's not working, but you got to write it, and then you got to get feedback. And it's going to be hard to accept sometimes, but it's going to help you refine your writing, your skills. It's going to help you deepen your storytelling abilities and capabilities. And eventually there's going. There's this revised stuff.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:17:46

It's going to improve the book that you want to publish. Now, that's worth it. That's worth the growing pains. So if I could give you three things that you're going to remember about this is growing pains are natural, guys. That's. They're just natural. Second is growing pains are necessary. They are a necessary part of growth.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:18:11

And then third, growing pains, they mean something. And you know what they mean to me. And that, hopefully, will mean to you that there's transformation, there's growth, and there's development. So don't shy away from challenges. You need to see them as opportunities for development. Don't run away. Embrace the growing pains, and as they are building blocks to reaching full potential for. For you and for your life.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:18:34

And I just can't imagine what would happen if you. If you didn't give yourself the opportunity to grow. What would happen if you didn't give yourself the opportunity to take on that challenge, to be transformed, to be able to now take what is old and turn it around on the inside and let it produce something new, something brand new. This is all in you already. It's a part of your life. We've got to take more time, pay more attention to what's going on around us. Sit down. Reflect.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:19:08

Think about it. Embrace the growing pains. Embrace them. Always embrace them. As soon as they come, get to work with it. Never stop the growing. And I encourage you to share that with someone else. Share with someone that you know ways that you plan to grow and encourage them to do the same.

Tim Pecoraro [: 00:19:28

So that's it for this week, and until next time. We'll talk soon.